Being Thankful

It's already more than midway through the first month of 2019. Gosh, time flies. We never know what tomorrow brings because sometimes we are so preoccupied with work, relationships, family, friends. What's more with Chinese New Year around the corner.. I can already feel the new year weight management resolution flying out of the window.

Lately, I'm really thankful for a few things. I'm thankful firstly for the love and support from my girlfriend, family and friends in 2018; without which I could have not made it through many tough moments, especially those tough days at work. I know there's much work to be done in my personal life, especially now that the weight of many things have started bearing down upon me in adulthood. I want to be a good boyfriend, son and also friend all at the same time. Many times it is difficult to juggle so many things, and never more so than now. I wonder what the rest of 2019 will be like, but I hope that it can be a year of reflection, growth and healing.

I'm also grateful for having supportive managers at work. Having been through 3 employers now I have seen and experienced the different working styles that each manager has; how we need to adapt, respond and also manage their expectations accordingly in different ways. It is also through my latest line managers that I had the opportunity to move upwards quickly in the organisation that I'm currently in. Now that it has happened, I suddenly feel a sense of.. "Ok, what's next?".. creeping up in my mind. Not sure if that should be the case, but it certainly warrants a period of self-reflection.

As I ponder over what will presumably be a very eventful year ahead, I silently treasure this quiet moment to pen my thoughts into this post. I fear the future, that is only the human part of me, but at the same time I cling on to a quiet hope that everything will be okay. It will be okay.

Be Vulnerable

It's close to the end of the year, where many sit down in their quiet moments and make reflections upon the last 12 months. I'm no different. Over the last few days I've been in prayer and reflection over what has past me by this year. Time in 2018 has been fleeting; many happy moments, but also many challenging ones.

Lately, two words have played in my mind over and over; the words "Be Vulnerable". I realise that often I'm looked upon as someone who has everything going right, someone who had a wonderful and blessed life. I find myself putting on a mask, afraid to show the world my vulnerabilities, and that perhaps not everything is going perfectly beneath the surface.

I wish everything could be ideal all the time, but often it is not. I find myself being challenged by health issues, work problems, relationship matters and at times I feel really tired - both mentally and physically. Moments like these, I now know God is trying to remind me of who is in control, and who has the future in His hands. A video by Joel Osteen encouraged me to take off the mask, to commit my problems to He who is in control. I'm reminded of God's grace, and that He got this. As it is, I'm slowly learning to redirect my focus and trust Him with my burdens.

As I live my life I always try to see the big picture, to have things planned out in the long term. There are many small wins throughout 2018 and I'm really thankful for the people in my life who made them possible. As the year close out there are still a couple of things that I'm really excited about, but as I quieten my heart I feel that my focus should be channeled to things that really matter. There are many short term obstacles that I need to see through; they will not be easy, but I know with God I will get through them.

As always, nobody knows what the future holds, but I know mine will be alright in God's hands.

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. - Jeremiah 29:11 

2017 ----> 2018

Over the new year I was taught many things. I was reminded to be appreciative of the things around me, and most importantly to never take things for granted. In the past few weeks there were many things to be grateful about, but the thing that topped it all was time spent with my family. Simple things such as helping Dad out with gardening, chatting with mum, or disturbing the little sister, brought more joy than anything else in the year. As the year winded down in 2017, it was the blood relations that mattered more than anything.

New year, expanded role, new colleagues, more independence but at the same time being relied on more than ever. The pressure to perform is there, but then I am reminded of the phrase "to help others succeed before yourself, is the key step to success". Opportunities arise, and the chances to learn have never been greater. They say uncertainty is the measure of one stepping of his comfort zone, and never more have I felt more uncertain, vulnerable, than now.

But as I attended the wedding of a close secondary school friend, I am reminded of who is in control.

"In everything you do, put God first, and he will direct you and crown your efforts with success."
Proverbs 3:6 

Seeing the joyous couple give thanks to God first, touched my heart more than anything. A path built upon the Lord shall not waiver, and he who sets his heart on the Lord shall not be weary. Committing the year ahead to God, may it be as good or even better than 2017.

I refuse to be Plan B

"I refuse to be plan B," says a friend. Do you feel that way too?

Have you come across situations where you knew you were the fallback option for your buddies, only cause their plan A couldn't make it?

It makes sense when you are given a heads-up that they have already made plans previously. But what if you knew you were being prioritise over something else although your request came ahead of the other party?

Example:

You asked your friend if he/she was available for dinner on Day X. He/she doesn't confirm on their availability. By the time you follow up, he/she tells you that unfortunately they have plans for the day already.

THE BEST PART IS - You knew your request came earlier!

Fine you get angry/annoyed/disappointed.. but the awkward part comes when your friend's plans get cancelled and they come back to you saying, "Hey my plans got cancelled, do you wanna do dinner?".........

Will you say yes to be being plan B?

Another Chapter

First week into another chapter of life. It feels so amazing that it has been 3 years since I have graduated from school. Another period of adjustment, getting use to a new environment and also learning new things. There's a positive vibe though, and I'm happy that I chose to step out of my comfort zone. Time will tell if it's the right choice, but hey.. I guess experiencing new things will only be a step further in growth. 

On a random note, just today I was reminded of how insensitivity of words can be hurtful. 

Mid Year Review

1. Reduce body fat % to below 25%

- This is definitely not done.

2. Reduce weight to below 75kg

- This has been completed, pretty happy. I think my weight is about 73/4 now. Trying to push it lower by maintaining a healthier diet and keeping up with exercise.

3. Complete reading at least 2 books

- Not done yet, gotta start forcing myself to finish the books that I have started.

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In other news, half of 2017 have flown by in a flash. Changes coming up: End of programme soon, new employment. Hope the second half of 2017 will be good to me.

New Year 2017

Some goals for the year (work in progress):

1. Reduce body fat % to below 25%

2. Reduce weight to below 75kg

3. Complete reading at least 2 books